Fields Of Innocence Shattered
by Mari Grem
Summary: Emmeline Vance lost her bestfriend, Lily, to death last year. Emma's thoughts on Lily's death as she stands at the gravestone. Songfic and Oneshot rnr.


**Disclaimer: Harry Potter is JK Rowling's. The song belongs to Evanescence.**

**A/N: Another One-shot. Emmeline Vance's view on Lily's death one year after it happened. **

**Background info: Lily and Emmawere best friends, Emma and James were really close, Sirius and Emma are engaged.**

**Please review! -Cole**

* * *

Emmeline Vance stared blankly at the graveston, tears running freely down her face. It had been a year since her death. A year since Emma's best friend had died, murdered at the hand of the Dark Lord. Emma placed a lily on the ground, Lily had loved her namesake, and Emma had placed a lily on the grave every month for the past year, this month was no exception.

Emma let the tears roll freely, trying so hard not to think of the pain, not to think about how happy they once were. She remembered how easy life once was. She remembered James and Sirius' pranks, Quidditch, but most of all she remembered the Maruaders' Legacy. A legacy now gone.

Every happy thought that Emma could remember was tainted, destroyed, brought tears to her eyes. Every single happy thought was about Hogwarts, about innocence and naiveity, about Lily. And Lily was gone, dead, stone cold.

Emma dropped the lily and turned away. She slowly walked to the end of the graveyard and wipped away the incessant tears. 'If only I knew then what I know now. I would have never let her go.'

_I still remember the world _

From the eyes of a child

Slowly those feelings

Were clouded by what I know now

Emma could no longer feel. She knew that. And as she walked the six miles back to her house, instead of apparating, in the pouring rain, with no umbrella, she felt nothing. Her heart was numb, frozen, gone. She had lost Lily, her best friend, James, her brother in every part of the word besides blood, and Sirius, her boyfriend, fiance.

Sirius was gone. Not dead, worse. He was a traitor, atleast the world branded him as such. But Emma knew differently, she just culdn't believe that he would do such a thing as kill James. They were best friends, brothers, nothing kept them apart, no rift was ever formed. Sirius wouldn't do something like that. Emma knew that, believed it wholeheartedly.

Too bad the rest of the world would never believe her until Sirius' dieing day.

Emma continued to walk, the tears rolling down her face. Even Remus had given up on Sirius' innocence, but she couldn't. She loved him, and she would give anything to go back to the way things once were.

Emma wanted to go back to a time when good always won, love always prevailed, and best friends didn't kill each other.

_Where has my heart gone _

An uneven trade for the real world

I want to go back to

Believing in everything and knowing nothing at all

The rain didn't let up the whole walk home. She remembered two years ago, when they were all gathered at the Potter's for Harry's first Halloween. It was so sunny that day, everyone was so happy, no one even thought of Voldemort or his threat that day.

Suddenly, the rain felt like acid. The October warmth felt like icey wind.

Life was always colder when you loose everyone you've ever loved.

_I still remember the sun _

Always warm on my back

Somehow it seems colder now

Emma opened the door to her flat. She didn't even bother drying off, what was the point? She simply walked over to the stove and boiled water, then she went into her room, sat down on her bed, and cried.

Emma felt numb as the tears rolled down her face. She couldn't feel the pain anymore, not conciously atleast. It was as if this whole year she had been a ghost, a pigment of imagination. It was as if she had lived the past year as a stranger, a person unknown by the world.

A forgotten soul, still alive, forced to roam the world alone.

Emma wanted to go back to a time when everyone was carefree, when Voldemort was nothing more than a robber, and no one was dieing every day. Emma wanted to go back to a time when innocence seemed universal, when darkness was only a nightmare, she wanted to go back when all good seemed real, all darkness imaginary.

_Where has my heart gone _

Trapped in the eyes of a stranger

I want to go back to

Believing in everything

Emma fell asleep that night, tears still rolling down her face. The water was left to boil over, causing a mess to be cleaned in the morning. That night Emma dreamed of the Marauders and their glory days.

In the morning she awoke to the bright sunlight, something she would have smiled about thriteen months ago. Today she simply shrugged and forced herself out of bed.

The real world was a bitch, a sadistical, hypocritical bitch. Emma would give any thing to go back, back when she believed in everyhting good, and knew nothing of the real world.


End file.
